everytime...

i hear nina simone sing, something in me is moved. something in me changes.

http://www.ninasimone.com/

peace.

fasting: that's a wrap (updated)

updates at the bottom...

ok, so it's about that time. it’s been about two years since my last ten+ day fast/cleanse. yeah, slackin’. but, it’s never too late. this time round i'm doing ten days. fasting for one) mental clarity and discipline and two) clean out from my horribly poor eating habits (I’m a HUGE binge snacker. like huge.) it's good to just clean your ish out and refresh, ya know. and from that, you gain so much clarity. for real.

different people use different cleanses/fasts. i do the master cleanse:

http://healthandlight.com/TheMasterCleanse.pdf

(this is the PDF of the original book, if you're interested in looking at it. it's about 30 pgs long.)

it's always good to journal these things to see your progress, to come back to later or even the next time, ect. some days i might write more, others less. depends on how i'm feelin'. so, here we go...

first, here's the daily process:

morning:
on an empty stomach, and before i drink any of the lemonade, i drink a sea/salt water flush. this is by far the most horrible thing i've ever done. i always gag. i mean, warm salt water? come on. bleh. but, if done correctly, about 10-30 min later, you'll literally "flush" everything out of you and your intestines that the laxative tea and the lemonade mix loosened the night before. oh, and when i say 10-30 min, that means you need to do it at LEAST an hour before you have to go ANYWHERE. yes, the all caps was needed. once it hits, you have no choice but to get to the bathroom asap or embarrass yourself. i've heard so many stories of people drinking it on the way out the door and then driving to work and on the way, while in the car, losing their shit. literally! oh, and if you don't get your measurements right it won't flush through your system. you ever walk around with a quart of warm salt water in your stomach? i don't recommend it.

The sea/salt water flush consists of:

• 2 teaspoons uniodized sea salt (can vary from person to person)
• 32 oz. (4 cups) purified water

afternoon:
i drink the lemonade mix throughout the day and supplement it with as much water as i think i need.

a serving of lemonade consists of:

• 2 tablespoons freshly-squeezed juice from a lemon or lime
• 2 tablespoons grade b organic maple syrup (whole foods/trader joes)
  
• 1/10 of teaspoon cayenne pepper (more or less depending on your tolerance)
  
• 8 oz. of purified water (cool or warm)

i make mine all at once for the day. the following measurements are for 8 cups/servings total:

• 1 cup freshly-squeezed juice from a lemon or lime
• 1 cup grade b organic maple syrup (whole foods/trader joes)
  
• 1 teaspoon of teaspoon cayenne pepper (more or less depending on your tolerance)
  
• 64 oz. of purified water (cool or warm)

organic ingredients are preferred. i drink at least 6 servings of the lemonade by the time i go to bed. the master cleanse book recommends between six to twelve. lemons have to be fresh (no pre-made juice) and if you have to make it before you start drinking, i'd recommend only making it a day before at the most. ex) i make mine the night before.

evening:
before bed, and after i’ve had enough of the lemonade, i have
a cup of laxative tea (smooth move). this breaks up more of the ish the lemonade mix has been breaking down while you sleep.

ok, so that's the process. everyday. for the next ten days...

day one (monday):

woke up super tired. maybe i'm anticipating the not eating, too much. one day at a time. when i took the first drink my body was like, oh, i remember what this means. ha. not looking forward to the salt water flush tomorrow morning AT all. eww. my jaw has been a bit clenched from wanting to chew and i almost chewed a piece of gum just outta habit. i am always just Waiting for it to be evening so i can just go to bed and not think about the not eating. and definitely not trying to go out! went to kickboxing. bad idea while fasting. super dizzy and tired. you're actually to suppose to do any hard workouts but i think i'm a glutton for pain. i recommend doing yoga. not only is it easy on the body, but it will further help to move all that ish around in you you're trying to get out. and, it's yoga :-) after kickboxing, i drank the tea and passed out.

day two (tuesday):

pretty good day. the evening has proven to be the hardest. at work, i'm busy so i don't think about it as much, but in those silent moments. oh. i've learned over time (i've done this fast four times now) that if i just go to bed, i don't have to worry about it. so i tend to go to sleep as soon as i get home :-) definitely smoked three cigs but i've decided that that i can't be so hard on myself. three is less than the eight i was smoking two days ago. went to teach my girls and made them chicken sandwiches with the most juiciest strawberries and bananas on the side. oh, so brutal. after girls group i went to yoga. so much better than kickboxing. i left feeling centered and strong. physically and mentally. got home late. drank tea. passed out. today and tomorrow are usually my "hump" days (the hardest!), so i'm extra focused.

day three (wednesday):

was a really hard day as i was expecting. maybe my expectation made it hard? i dunno. from experience, day three, four and sometimes five are THE hardest. like, nerve wrecking, dilusionoidal, irritatingly hard.

did the flush in the morning and was amazed at what came out (sorry to be graphic, but it's the point of fasting/cleansing!). i mean really, that was just sitting in me all this time?!? eeew, gross. oh so glad to be done with it. later in the eve i hooked up with my ladies and that was BRUTAL (let me preface by saying it was not their fault at all.)

first came the amazing salad. gewelz is a master salad maker. a connoisseur of sorts. she made. they ate. i watched. then came, the phở. ooooooooh, the phở. straight vietnamese goodness. so, while watching awesome sex and the city re-runs, i had to pull every bit of will power i had in me, while honestly wonderin' if i could just sneak something because no one would know but me, while they ate the yummiest smelling phở to ever hit my nose. all i can say is thank goodness it was evening. i'm known for falling asleep after 9pm, and that's exactly what i did. i'm telling you. sleep is your friend when you're fasting. forgot to take the tea, but that's ok.

on a side note: i've been sleeping a lot better, and all through the night (i usually wake up every hour or so), since i've been fasting. SO very thankful for that!

side note # two: i have most definitely been plotting and planning my first meals. they will be GLOOOOOORIOUS. hahahahaha...

three down, seven to go. rock-n-roll.

day four (thursday):

yep, it's most definitely getting easier. flush went went well in the morning. went to work and felt good all day. energy up. spirits up. no mishaps or even really hard moments today. see, after that third and fourth day, it really does get better! looking forward to tomorrow. jerry (kinda work with him) said something so on point. he's done this before as well. he said, after the initial hump, it gets better because then, you get to choose...

day five (friday):

good day. pretty easy breezy. noticing the tea + flush combo is too hard on my stomach. gonna exclude one. went to yoga and had a great practice. way better for your body while fasting than working out. yep, gettin' easier and easier...

day six (saturday):

woke up with the same bit of stomach ache i had yesterday. didn't drink tea or flush. warm liquid burning feeling kinda of gushing through me throughout the morning. i've felt this before. realized two things (i won't gore you with how i know. let's just say, your body will tell you when it's time/you're done). one) i'm all squeaky clean! oh yeah!! two) because of that, my intestinal walls is starting to get irritated because there's nothing else in there to flush but the flesh. and that's why i was feeling liquid burning sensations in my stomach.

sooooo, i decided to go ahead and come off my fast today. it's been a great six days and i wish i could go to ten, but i don't want to overdue it. i'm good for pushing through pain and usually i just end up with way more problems down the road because i don't take care of my Self until i Have to. i've been better at listening to what my body is telling me. you'll be surprised, but it's pretty darn smart!

i decided to eat some soup. i had some beet and cabbage and also a chicken broth-like soup with veggies. not the best thing to come off with, but i've fasted enough times, trying this and that, to know what i can and cannot do.

the first food you eat is always an Amazing sensation. because you're so clean inside, you can literally feel the food trickling down your stomach. pretty crazy-cool things. i got full pretty quickly and am feeling alright. also, your senses are heightened so everything actually tastes more distinctive. flavors are richer. smells are more luscious. mmmmmmm...

tomorrow i'll eat more soup. maybe have a salad. my wed i'll be back on the real deal.

just so ya know...

"this brings us to the definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result." -albert einstein

mmmhmmm.

peace,
nzingha

lesson number: dr. seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - dr. seuss

so simple. so true. so freeing.

much love,
nzingha

if...

jay-z and beyonce had a kid, it would be named: Marcy Fierce Carter.

aaaaaahahahaha. i don't care what you say, that's some funny ish!

and if you don't get it, that's ok. i generally don't ;-)

peace,
nzingha

all the time...

i love coming back to the simplicity of my spirit self. knowing that there is a higher order. something bigger and greater than us all. all of our religion(s). all of our right(s) and wrong(s)...

grace is getting what we don't deserve.
mercy, is not getting what we do deserve.

let that sit with you for a minute. don't think too much on it. we spend to much time in our head space and not in our spirit and heart space...

think about your life. the blessing you have received when you least deserved or expected them. (thank you for your grace.)

the times when you should have been the worse off and yet, you were not. (thank you for your mercy.)

God is good, all the time. all the time, God is good.

peace,
nzingha

on this day of thanks...

this day, and every day, i am ever thankful for the people in my life. and yes, that includes you! i am truly blessed to have the most outstanding and phenomenal family and friends. people that love, and put up with, me on a daily basis. people that not only stand by me in my light, but also in my dark. people who accept me for who i am with all my beauties as well as all my flaws.

thank you.

i pray that you continue to see the many blessings in your life. even those that don't seem like blessings at first glance. they are all around you. in your home, in your work, while you're driving in your car, while your walking your dog, when you wake up in the morning, when you fall asleep at night...

all you have to do is open yourself, and look.

much peace and all my love,
nzingha


live with intention.

walk to the edge.

listen hard.

practice wellness.

play with abandon.

laugh.

choose with no regret.

appreciate your friends.

continue to learn.

do what you love.

live as if this is all there is.

-mary anne radmacher